sweetestsurrender | { Hardest Thing To Say Meme }

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{ Hardest Thing To Say Meme }

Sometimes the hardest things to say are also the most important. It doesn't matter how much it scares you to do so, it's finally time to be honest.

- post as your character.
- others go to RNG and roll numbers 1-22 then respond setting up a scenario.
- respond and have fun!

01. I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE Unfortunately, you can't keep lying to your partner/friend/family anymore. You just don't feel the same for them anymore.
02. I WOULD KILL YOU The person who means so much to you has done something completely unforgivable and now it's time to make sure they know where they stand. You would kill them if you ever got the chance.
03. I LOVE YOU, BUT... A bittersweet love confession. You know you love this person more than anything, but you're not sure you can give them what they need.
04. I DON'T TRUST YOU No matter how you feel about this person, you really can't trust them anymore.
05. SACRIFICE You're going to sacrifice yourself, for the person you're talking with or for the good of all humanity. You want them to know the reasons and that there's no stopping you.
06. TROUBLE You're in trouble and you might not make it through. You need to let at least one person know how you feel before it's too late though.
07. CRIME CONFESSION You did something you weren't proud of and now it's time to admit it.
08. DEMONS We've all got our demons and we've all got our own personal nightmares we have to face, but this time? You can't hold it all back.
09. I'M PREGNANT... Now's not the best time for it maybe or maybe you're just nervous how your partner will react, but they need to hear it.
10. BETRAYAL You've betrayed this person and you have to tell them the truth, no more running from it
11. CHEATED You've been unfaithful and it's time to tell your lover.
12. BROKEN That's it. You've had it. You are entirely broken and tired of everything.
13. AFRAID Something has you deathly afraid and you need to talk about it.
14. HELP ME You need someone to help you, bad. You can't do it alone anymore, you've tried.
15. I'M SORRY You said something or did something horrible and now it's time to ask for forgiveness.
16. YOU WERE A MISTAKE Sorry, but whoever you're talking to was the biggest mistake of your life or maybe it was just something you did together.
17. NOT WHO I SAY I AM You're so far from who they think you are, you need to finally tell the truth.
18. LET'S RUN AWAY You want to just get out, leave everything behind and be with this one person for the rest of your life.
19. ASHAMED Either you're ashamed of something they have done or something you did, either way you need to bring it up.
20. CAN'T REMEMBER The person standing in front of you looks so happy to see you, so relieved, but how do you tell them you can't remember a thing about them?
21. HOW COULD YOU You don't understand how they could treat you like they have, do what they have done when you've done nothing but be good to them.
22. YOUR CHOICE Either choose an option from above, mix and match, or make up your own idea.

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He went positively crimson at the suggestion, and tossed back a shot. "In my defense, he was extremely charismatic, and I was entirely unprepared for the reality of facing him. He managed to corner me into a kiss, and there was no hope for me after that," he smiled wryly, glancing up at Duo to gauge his reaction. "It seemed at the time that he knew everything about me, but I realize now that he was simply more experienced."

Duo, for how animated he could be, could also be very still when he chose to. And right then he was. He showed a near complete lack of emotion as he listened to Wufei. Because he wasn't entirely sure how he felt about hearing that rumour being true. He remembered knocking someone on their ass for even suggesting it and distantly wondered if he could find that person and apologise.

His lashes lowered and he looked down at his mess of pizza. Most of which was gone aside from the crust.

"I should get another slice. You want another slice, Wufei?" Duo scooted forward and put his shot glass down before getting to his feet and padding off to the kitchen to dump the cold crusts and grab another two slices of pizza.

Wufei dropped his gaze, swallowing visibly. "Yeah. Another slice would be good," he agreed as his smile evaporated. He focused on pouring himself another shot while Duo was busy getting more pizza, and wondered just how badly he'd fucked up by sharing that.

Not fucked up. Just needing a moment to process.

Duo ended up just leaning with his hands on the counter, lost in thought for a long moment.

Could they really be blamed for the things they did in the past? Wufei was his own person and, by the sound of it, had been used by that asshole. So why did it make Duo feel... He shook his head and pulled himself together. Grabbed the two slices of pizza he really just didn't feel like eating right then, and carried them back out.

With a sigh he dropped back down onto the sofa and set the plate in his lap after he'd kicked his feet up onto the table, narrowly missing his shot glass.

"One for you." He grabbed one of the slices and placed it on Wufei's plate. Then made himself grin and grabbed the other. "And one for me!"

"Thank you," Wufei replied, smiling a little as he watched Duo for a moment. He knew the other well enough to recognize the mask for what it was, picking up his slice and taking a bite as he considered his next question carefully, and decided that being a coward was simply unacceptable.

"Are you angry that I slept with him, or just shocked that I could manage to forge an actual human connection?" He kept his tone light, half-teasing and half-serious so it would be easy for Duo to deflect the question if he wanted to. People often thought Wufei wasn't very good at socializing, but when he cared for someone he could be downright sensitive.

Well, shit. They were playing a game after all. So of course Wufei would question his behaviour. The problem was... Duo wasn't entirely sure how to answer without looking like a dick.

He put his pizza down again, without having taken a bite, and kind of wished he had a dog. He could just throw the damn thing to the beast without having to move a muscle. Which was probably a bad reason to buy a dog...

"Neither." He finally admitted, once he was sure he wasn't going to open his mouth and start talking about the kinds of dogs that would enjoy pizza. "If I'm angry at anyone, it's him for takin advantage of you. And me for being..." Duo trailed off and gave a low, humourless laugh. "... It's stupid."

"What?" He demanded, straightening up as he shot Duo a scowl. He might not have been offended by the question, but this? "I was not taken advantage of," he completely missed the unsaid portion of that, his brain skipping tracks at the idea that he, that anyone could... That he would allow. Nope, couldn't even finish the thoughts. "I went to him. Repeatedly," he was going to die on this hill, apparently.

Duo glanced over with a frown. "You made it sound like that's what happened..." He stopped, bit down hard on his tongue and moved his plate aside so that he could lean forward and grab his shot glass.

Wrong assumptions meant he should drink, right? Misunderstandings too. He'd heard Wufei but hadn't quite understood. "My bad. Sorry, buddy. Didn't mean anythin by it." He knocked the drink back and refilled the glass. After a moments hesitation, he drank that one as well.

He shook his head, letting out a long sigh. "I didn't... why did it sound that way?" He didn't quite understand, and he knew that Duo's reaction was probably close to what anyone else would think, too. So if he wanted to avoid it if he ever told anyone else, it only made sense to find out how he'd given that impression.

And he was absolutely going to ignore the queasy feeling that had suddenly taken root in his stomach. It was definitely just the greasy pizza and whiskey, not any pesky sort of emotional baggage. He didn't have any of that, nope.

"Doesn't matter, I'm just glad it wasn't something you didn't want." Not that he'd actually believed that Wufei had been forced. Just manipulated. Treize was 'charismatic' and 'experienced' after all.

He gave himself another refill before he settled back again with a sigh of his own.

"Think it's your turn. Or are you done with drinkin games now?" Duo asked with a crooked smile. He'd not be surprised if he'd managed to accidentally mess things up. All he could do is apologise if he had.

Wufei sighed softly, sizing Duo up for a moment. He didn't exactly plan to tell anyone else about Treize, so technically Duo was right. It didn't matter, but it certainly gave his brain something to nibble on.

He shook his head, turning his attention to his shot glass as he considered his next question. "Alright," he considered his options, his phrasing. "You were once madly in love with Heero, but he never felt the same towards you." He wasn't sure if he hoped he was right or not.

Duo snorted a laugh. "Dumb crush isn't madly in love. There was maybe... a minute... where I thought it was love. I was probably just horny. But I'm no masochist, Wufei. I don't need to be told twice before I get the hint. No idea if he ever felt the same about me. He never showed any interest. I never asked him."

And that was about it. Once upon a time he'd thought maybe it was love. But since he'd had no idea what love even felt like, it soon became clear that it wasn't actually love but hormones. Horny teenage hormones. Heero Yuy was a damn fine looking man, after all.

Wufei chuckled at that, quirking a brow. "This is Heero we're talking about. How do you know he didn't like you if you never asked?" he followed it quickly with his shot, and refilled it again. They were putting it away fast enough that he was starting to feel it, but he didn't mind. It helped him get over himself enough to be as open and honest as he wanted to. "Who else have you had crushes on?"

Duo was definitely feeling a buzz. He'd forgotten to pick up his pizza again but it was just as well, he wasn't really interested in eating it anymore.

"Because it's Heero. If he thought his emotions were compromised he'd have killed me." And wasn't that a sad piece of logic right there. A testament to just how screwed up they all were. He wasn't the one Heero had wanted to kill. Relena had been.

"Hilde..." Kind of. But he'd already explained that one away. As for anyone else... There was no way he was drunk enough to answer that. Especially not now.

Wufei hummed in agreement. "I don't think I would've wanted to risk that, either," he agreed with a sad little smile. "Well. Hopefully you'll find someone new soon, I can't imagine being alone is any better for you than it is for me."

"Probably better being alone." Duo had closed his eyes, his head fallen back against the sofa, his glass held between his hands in his lap. "Can't get hurt if you're alone. Can't hurt others. Maybe I'm a coward, maybe I'm doin the world a service. But who the hell is crazy enough to like me in the first place? I was even too much for Hilde to handle and she likes me."

Wufei swallowed heavily, watching Duo closely for a long moment. He took his shot and threw caution to the wind. If he fucked everything up, well, he'd just be right back where he started, but Duo deserved his honesty. Especially if he was going to stay here for any length of time.

"Me," he said firmly, slamming the shot glass back down on the table. "But I've always been attracted to people I can't have." Not long-term, anyway.

Duo bit down hard on the inside of his cheek, hard enough he could taste the coppery tang of blood on his tongue. If it had been anyone else he might have thought they were joking at his expense. But Wufei didn't sound like he was joking. And he would never have joked about this... So where did that leave Duo? How was he supposed to reply to that after he'd just literally shoved his foot in his mouth?

So he took a deep breath... and sighed.

"Can you not?" He spoke in a deceptively calm voice. "Table didn't do anythin to deserve you slamming it like that. And who said you can't have me? What you can't have is any more whiskey if you're gonna try breaking my glasses and furniture."

He quirked a brow, gaze darting up to meet Duo's. He held the other's gaze for a long moment as his heart tried to crawl right up his throat. He swallowed heavily again, forcing it back down into place. "The stuffed silks that call themselves my clan elders, I suppose, but I snapped that leash long ago. I only pretend to listen to them when it suits me." He didn't trust his hand to stay steady enough to pour another shot, so he left the glass on the table, ignored it even. "So was it a lie of omission, then? When you didn't admit to a crush on me?"

"No. You asked if I had a crush on anyone. I don't..." because it hasn't been a crush. With Heero it had been lust. But Wufei... It was Wufei he'd been mad for. He'd teased mercilessly just for the hopes of a little attention, maybe a smile, maybe even a laugh. Duo had given up on that idea after the war. Now, with the new knowledge he had, he realised he'd never stood a chance. There was no way on hell he could have held a candle to someone like Treize. He'd never even been in the running.

So maybe he'd felt a twinge of jealousy a moment ago? For his past self who had lost before he'd even realised it was a race.

"I'd cared for you a bit more than just a crush, Wufei..." Duo, when he spoke, his voice was..quieter. Almost gentle. His eyes had closed again, almost afraid to look anymore.

He felt his world tilt a little, pain flashing through his chest as his gaze dropped and tears burned at his eyes. "Then I'm sorry I came," he whispered, clearing his throat as he pushed to his feet and turned to leave. "I won't hurt you like this again," he promised, already on his way to the door and willing himself not to cry until he was alone.

He'd known it was a terrible idea, but some perverse, masochistic part of himself had needed to know for sure. Needed to crush out the last hopes he'd had of any kind of happiness for himself.

Now that wasn't good enough, was it? Wufei had wanted him to be honest. Had kind of made him sound like aan asshole for keeping it to himself. So when he admitted his feelings, when he told the truth, the bastard went and tried to run away? Duo didn't think so.

He was on his feet and on the move before he had any conscious thought behind it. In a few long strides he'd reached Wufei. He'd grabbed him, turned him and pushed him up against the wall.

And then Duo dropped his hands. He stood in the others way, blocking him from leaving for the moment, but he wasn't going to force himself on Wufei. All he wanted was for him to stop...

"Why..." Duo shook his head slowly, still not fully comprehending what was going on here. "... You're not fucking with my feelings, I know you'd never do that. Not deliberately. But you started this, Wufei. You lead me down this path. You wanted the truth. So why the fuck are you running away from it? From me?"

It took considerable self control not to react to that with violence. Every instinct he had screamed for retaliation, but he let himself be shoved up against the wall. Stayed there, with tears on his cheeks as he met Duo's gaze.

He gathered up what little courage he had left. "It's not past-tense for me, Maxwell," he said softly, maybe there was a little bitterness there, but he didn't think that was too far out of line. "I had foolishly hoped there might be something more than friendship here, but if that's all you can offer me I will gladly take it. I only ask you give me the chance to gather what's left of my dignity in private." Let him mourn the loss before he'd be able to maintain the boundaries friendship demanded.

Edited 2021-11-24 04:13 (UTC)

"No." The word left his lips before he could stop it. No, he wasn't going to let Wufei leave. Why the hell would he do that? Duo would probably have reached out by now but he didn't want to fight. He'd seen the flash in Wufei's eyes, it was part of why he'd dropped his hands and hadn't actually pinned him against the wall.

"... If it was past tense for me, you think I'd have gotten jealous like I did before? C'mon, Wufei. Think. What kinda friend let's another guy friend sleep in their lap and hold their hand? Outta the blue without asking a damn thing? I don't do this with everyone, y'know? In fact just one. You."

He frowned tightly when he was told no, biting back his knee-jerk reaction and forcing himself to stay put, listen. And it was a damn good thing he was leaning on a wall because his knees were absolutely trying to give out on him, all the sudden. He searched Duo's face, as if he somehow suspected it was a prank, or a lie, or... but Duo would never do something like that.

He reached up, grabbing Duo by the front of his shirt and tugging him closer. "I'm going to be extremely angry about this the second I stop being relieved," he growled.

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