1: ⭒ they just gave me fireworks and firewater. let's make heart attack-inducing magic happen.
2: ⭒ look, i know you're stressed out but making cat noises will not fix the situation.
3: ⭒ We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
4: ⭒ i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
5: ⭒ You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
6: ⭒ He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
7: ⭒ I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
8: ⭒ I thought it was your cat but I was wrong - your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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sweetestsurrender2021-10-25 06:59 pm
Duo Maxwell | Gundam Wing | OTA
2: ⭒ look, i know you're stressed out but making cat noises will not fix the situation.
3: ⭒ We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
4: ⭒ i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
5: ⭒ You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
6: ⭒ He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
7: ⭒ I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
8: ⭒ I thought it was your cat but I was wrong - your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
[WILDCARD]